After Thoughts

Sometimes I’m not sure what I like better – sex, or the blissful state after sex when you’re both lying there, bodies entangled, drooling slightly, and everything looks kinda blurry. Before you have to get up and grab whatever’s in the laundry hamper to clean up the mess.

The time when guys notoriously want to roll over and go to sleep.

I still remember one guy I went out with who was notorious for this. We used to joke that he was like one of those dolls whose eyes close when you lay it down. Except it wasn’t all that funny when it happened. Coming down off sex alone – when you’re not alone – is a drag.

And it can be a real source of a tension in a relationship.

She enjoys basking in the afterglow, while remaining relatively conscious, while he slips into a post-coital coma. But before you smack him over the head with a pillow, it’s not entirely his fault.

Comparing men’s and women’s sexual response cycle, there four phases: excitement, a plateau of sustained arousal, orgasm and, finally, resolution. After orgasm the graph for the male cycle takes a nosedive with the resolution phase lasting about a minute, while women enjoy a more gentle descent, taking about five or 10 minutes to come down. In other words, we take longer to warm up and cool down – that is, if we have something to cool down from. Getting to the resolution phase requires the orgasm before it. Sometimes guys get there before us too, sliding into sleep phase while we’re often left twiddling more than our thumbs.

What’s your guy like after sex? A real snoozer? A cuddler? A chatter? A dine-and-dasher?


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